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08-28-2016, 10:41 PM | #1 |
Tokusatsu Hero
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Maryland
Posts: 6,221
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Seeing that I didn't see any thread like this one, I decided to make one. So what's the worst movie you have ever seen? Everyone has different opinions, so I hope everyone can respect everyone's opinions.
My top 10 Worst Movies I've ever seen are: August Underground's Mordum - There is nothing good about this movie in my opinion. It feels like it was made by a 12 year old kid trying to be dark and edgy. It was painfully boring to watch because there was almost no story. Epic Movie - I saw this movie in theaters and wanted my money back. Nothing made me laugh. 10,000 BC (2008) - I saw this movie when it came out on my cousin's 15th birthday back in 2008. I almost wanted to walk out of the movie because it was so boring and the special effects are awful. Alone in the Dark - I remember renting this at Blockbuster and felt angry that I wasted my time on this movie. Terrible writing, bad acting and awful special effects. Zoom (That crappy superhero movie with Tim Allen) - Terrible movie with bad special effects and unfunny jokes. The Spirit - It was so bad that I walked out on the last 15 minutes of the movie. Johnson Family Vacation - I only saw this movie because my dad wanted to take the whole family to the movies back in 2004. The movie was painfully unfunny to watch. Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun-Li - The 1994 SF movie was cheesy fun while this movie was so awful to sit through. I remember renting it at the Red Box and returning it back as soon as possible. Hellraiser: Revelations - The movie is a insult to the Hellraiser series. The Love Guru - So bad that I didn't finish watching the rest of the movie. Honorable Mentions (in no particular order): Silent Hill: Revelation (This movie makes Mortal Kombat: Annihilation look great in my opinion) Son of the Mask Diary of a Cannibal Man of the House (I remember hating this movie as a kid) Urban Menace (A shitty movie with Snoop Dogg) Killjoy Nacho Libre (I know people will dislike me for listing this movie here) Open Water (Nothing hardly happens in this movie) BloodRayne Monster a Go-Go Raptor Island Haunted Prison
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08-28-2016, 11:28 PM | #2 |
Banned
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Englewood CO
Posts: 10,893
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Battlefield Earth followed by Mortdecai.
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08-28-2016, 11:39 PM | #3 |
Banned
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: Central Minnesota
Posts: 10,390
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Rob Schneider's Animal is up there. But then again I only watched it because I had faint memories of seeing it on TV as a GoseiWunderkind and needed to satiate the memories with full context so I could put them to rest finally. I wouldn't intentionally watch that crap otherwise.
Napoleon Dynamite was also rancid garbage. |
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08-29-2016, 01:20 AM | #4 |
Stronger Than You
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: nyet
Posts: 25,326
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Bio Dome. Pure trash. I was way too young for this movie (Thanks, HBO), but it did teach me a valuable lesson: Stoner comedies will never be good.
Dragonball Evolution. Goku is a high schooler? Ki is Airbending? Oozaru was formerly Piccolo's slave? WAT The Room. "It's so bad it's good!" I disagree. It sucks. Hard. There are funny moments to take away from it, no doubt. But to sit through it all, it's hard to find a laugh when not riffing it with someone. Starkid. Don't watch this movie. Please, don't watch it. The Guyver. *Gags* Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World. Let's take Scott Pilgrim, loud, brash, hot headed, and a total smartass, and cast an actor known to play shy, sheepish characters, make him bring aforementioned sheepish acting style and make a horrible love story out of it, but color it with video game references so people will like it! Let's remove the complexity of Scott's relationship with Ramona until the very end so it seems for 99% of the movie he's doing it just to bone her, and have him conveniently forget he already has a girlfriend for half the film's runtime, making him seem like a gigantic douche in the matter! I hate this movie, especially after getting to read some of the comics. Fuck it. I think it's terrible because they misrepresented the characters and watered things down too much so characters are way too shallow. Human Centipede. Like Bio Dome, pure trash. As a gore and snuff style horror flick, I've seen better. It's inconsistently shot and it's just eye rolling. Special mentions: Snow Dogs and Kangaroo Jack - Both for having scenes involving talking animals solely for trailer footage, despite both scenes barely lasting a minute or two, and, likewise, both during hallucinations AND only happening once in the movie. Listed here because neither movies were downright terrible, but they pissed me young off and I hate them for it. Everything by Friedberg and Seltzer. Taking what little heart and weak comedy the first two Scary Movies had and completely removing them, their shit is almost literally just a feature length Family Guy episode, except replace tolerable animation with shitty props that would make 70's toku and early Doctor Who look high quality. I only put it as a "Special mention" because 1. No way in hell I'm watching any of their shit after suffering through Meet the Spartans and 2. I'd rather not pad out my list by just throwing all their movies here
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08-29-2016, 11:46 AM | #5 |
Ex-Weather Three leader
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 10,530
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Smokin' Aces: This movie felt like it had potential at first glance alongside a star-studded cast but in the end felt poorly executed and a bit messy/rushed.
Home Alone 3: Only the parrot is worth salvaging from this wreckage. King Of Fighters: This could have been "GENERIC MARTIAL ARTS MOVIE YOU WILL SEE ON A SATURDAY AFTERNOON ON ONE OF THOSE JACK-OF-ALL-TRADES CABLE CHANNELS AFTER MOWING THE LAWN WHILE EATING LEFTOVERS AS YOU WATCH" and would have been less horrendous but no they had to slap the King Of Fighters name on it. No understanding of the source material is another reason this movie sucks. The TEKKEN live action movie was WAY better than this. Dead Or Alive: A waste of Kane Kosugi's talent. He deserves better than this. Shrek movies other than the first: Just blatant attempts at trying to get as much money as possible based on the fame of the first film. Ice Age movies other than the first: Just blatant attempts at trying to get as much money as possible based on the fame of the first film. Kamen Rider The Next: It does not know if it wants to be The Ring or a Kamen Rider film. The previous one had its flaws with the useless love story amongst non-rider characters but this is just stupid. The V3 costume and Kamen Rider 1's Sakurajima colors were cool though. Tiger Mask: Trying to make Tiger Mask a henshin hero was a bad choice.
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Last edited by Sunred; 08-29-2016 at 11:48 AM.. |
08-29-2016, 11:57 AM | #6 |
Stronger Than You
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: nyet
Posts: 25,326
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Concerning Shrek, I actually thought Shrek 2 did everything Shrek one failed to do right
It was one of those honest to goodness movie moments where the sequel was actually better than the first, for me~ Anyway, add Mortal Kombat: Annihilation onto my list. The first movie is regarded as one of the best video game movies, and even then it's not that good. This movie puts it into perspective of being about on par with SMB or Bloodrayne. Characters feel more shoehorned in than Reptile in the first film, the cheesy factor was ramped up too high and it just got annoying, and they chose the worst actor for Shao Kahn, wanting something cheesy a la Raul Julia's Bison rather than something good, like with Shang Tsung in the first film. And then the Animalities. Oh god, the Animality. Liu's dragon was changed from Chinese to Western for some reason, and what else...Oh yeah, EVERYTHING ELSE THAT HAPPENED IN THAT SCENE. I tolerate MK. I hate Annihilation.
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Last edited by Matrixbeast; 08-29-2016 at 11:59 AM.. |
08-29-2016, 03:38 PM | #7 |
Tokusatsu Hero
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Maryland
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Mortal Kombat: Annihilation, Dragon Ball Evolution and the first Guyver live action movie are so bad that they good to me. With MK:A you can laugh at the bad special effects, cheesy dialogue and bad acting. While movies like Silent Hill: Revelation, Alone in the Dark, Hellraiser: Revelations and August Underground have nothing good about them.
Not to mention DBE was going to be terrible from the start and I knew the movie was doom since 2007 when Fox announce the director and writer for the movie.
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08-29-2016, 03:54 PM | #8 |
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MKA's saving grace is its music. Oh, and I like James Remar.
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08-29-2016, 04:22 PM | #9 |
Stronger Than You
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: nyet
Posts: 25,326
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Quote:
Mortal Kombat: Annihilation, Dragon Ball Evolution and the first Guyver live action movie are so bad that they good to me. With MK:A you can laugh at the bad special effects, cheesy dialogue and bad acting. While movies like Silent Hill: Revelation, Alone in the Dark, Hellraiser: Revelations and August Underground have nothing good about them.
Not to mention DBE was going to be terrible from the start and I knew the movie was doom since 2007 when Fox announce the director and writer for the movie. I chose to leave out Boll flicks because his works were intentionally bad to abuse a German film loophole, while I haven't seen the other 3 (And I hadn't even heard of August Underground )
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08-29-2016, 04:24 PM | #10 |
The Patient Observer
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Wakanda
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Hercules (2005). Apparently it was a mini-series, but I borrowed it from blockbuster on one disk, and it played like a long movie, so I'm counting it. They needlessly switch around parts of the myth, or just alter them for nonsense reasons. Oh, the Stymphalian Birds? They're just harpies, from the same flock seen earlier in the movie. The Nemean Lion? It's just a sphinx. The Cretan Bull? It's just the leader of a gang, who happens to be Antaeus, who happens to also replace Cerebus as a Labor, and who also happens to be Hercules actual father in this story, not Zeus. Aren't we clever with are switcheroos....fuck this movie.
Also Megara and her children with Hercules absolutely hate him, so Hercules can't even have a loving family (before they're still violent deaths). Jinn on Netflix has great potential, which it completely ruins. I'm not even particularly sure when exactly it drops the neat idea it was going for, but I'm not re-watching it to pinpoint the moment. The animated Ironman and Dr. Strange movies Marvel made years back. I can't remember if the Ironman movie was the year of the Downey film, or just before, but man was that a mess. And the Dr. Strange film thought it would be smart to take a bunch of spellcasters, and reduce them to magic weapon melee fighters, with Strange only pulling off some of his usual wide array of spells towards the end. Helen of Troy, which is a surprising movie to exist the way it does, because I didn't think the moralistic 50's would try to make a movie about how it's cool to show two adulterers drive entire nations to war just so that they can bone, but hey, something can always surprise you. Odysseus is portrayed as a crooked schemer, just for being on the "bad guy" Greek side, Menelaus, who I'm not defending or claiming to be a great guy, needs two other guys behind him to "dare" take on Paris, and really, is this movie trying to make me side with or like Helen or Paris? They're assholes, always have been assholes, and if I'm going to give Troy credit, they got the characters' personalities right (even if they killed of Menelaus, who's supposed to live on). I could have had two more, but I have such vague memories of these films, that I can't even remember their titles, or most of their premises.
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