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03-24-2013, 11:32 AM | #1 |
Armoured Hero
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Las Vegas
Posts: 544
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Darksiders, a review:
Upon completion of this game, and some time to think on it? But first, lets get a little backstory, and a trailer. The Darksiders series is about the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse, and go figure. The Apocalypse. It seems in the first one that you are War, thus in Devil ma- Darksiders. You have to, you guessed it "Start the Apocalypse". It does so in such a way that, supposedly comes off as "Jump starting the apocolypse" Duh fuq? Jump starting the apocalypse. Meh, sounds like a Tuesday. But, in a weird way it seems that the apocalyp- Y'know what? I am tired of writing "Apocalypse", for the sake of this review? I am going to call it Angel and Demon Fun time. or A.D.F.T, this A.D.F.T. is the result of a angel prematurely attacking hell for supremacy. Yes, an Angel... turning evil... Never heard that before. Then. -insert the entire breif plot of the game- it turns out that War is being blamed for this A.D.F.T. is being demanded to right the wrongs, that he apparently started. Which he clearly did not. M'yeah... Oh yeah, and Mark Hammil is your Navi, what I would have done for him to pop up every five seconds screeching "Watch out!" "Hey Listen!" etc etc. Either way, this plot being put forward, you have to right the wrongs of the premature A.D.F.T., as humans where caught in the battle, and killed... like an apocalypse or something... weird. So, you are given charge and the first thing you are told to do is hunt down one of the people that have betrayed the main baddie, "The Destroyer". Which, if I know context (And I don't.) we are going to have a Steve Urkiel on our hands. This betrayer of "The Destroyer", is a demon by the name of Samuel, who... is essentially the devil from the Tom Cruise flick, Legend. Is essentially forcing you to go kill the big baddies, that if you didn't take out previously would have attacked you regardless. Fair enough. In progression, the game works like this: 1. Get betrayed. 2. Go to level after receiving power after being betrayed. 3. Traverse the bland land-scapes of... Murica'? (I honestly have no idea where this game is set... Europe perhaps?) 4. Traverse level, LOZ style. 5. Use item achieved by said level LOZ style. 6. You guessed it. Fight boss battle, using said item you just received. Legend. Of. Zelda. Style. 7. Get the bleeding heart of your opponent. 8. Get additional health. (Not even going to say it.) 9. Return to Samuel. To get betrayed in some way. Rinse and repeat 5 different times. Knowing this though the game does work in reverse, in a weird way. Though it does show the progression of War getting stronger, before he seeks out revenge. However, as he grows stronger, so do his enemies to the point that a single blow could take you out (Provided you only had one health bar... magically...) This being said, as War progressively gets stronger, and acquires new abilities from each temple ala Legend of Zelda. The game itself turns itself into an, "Hack and Slash adventure" into a combo puzzler... which despite puns, I thought was quite odd... and puzzling. Example? You get a portal gun. What in the hell is THQ's blatant rip off of The God of War, is Krat- I mean War... that he is a personification of namesake wise, going to do with a damn'd portal gun once the events of this game are over!? Especially seeing as this portal gun, in a nutshell is "location beneficent", which by definition makes it level specific, which means once the events of Darksiders are finished, his portal gun? Useless. (At-least he didn't pay money for it... Then again, these days? It seems everyone is getting a free portal gun, one way or another...) Now my overall thoughts on the game? I actually have to break the game down into various elements for this one. My categories of judgement are going to be: Graphics, Gameplay, Attacks, Merchant, Story, Overall completion. ______________________________________________________________ Graphics: 7/10 Overall Thoughts: Decent, but could be better. _______________________________________________________________ Yes, it is game from 2010. But, Kingdom Hearts is a game from 2001, and it still manages to look better then this game in most regards. Being a similar game to Devil May Cry, God of War, Legend of Zelda, Bayonetta, Kingdom Hearts, and games of those genres. The graphics really do seem sub-par compared to games that even came out prior to it. ______________________________________________________________ Gameplay: 5/10 Overall thoughts: "Meh..." _______________________________________________________________ People say I may say I am judging Darksiders to harshly, but I don't even give a damn. It gives off a mindset of direction, and sandbox... however, it seems the sandbox, is more of a trail... and the items in said sandbox are barbie sized. The overall layout of the game made the movement very stiff, and I cannot count enough how many times the camera angle got in the way of movement. Though I was able to change the camera angle, and it still managed to get in the way, as it was trying very to hard to emulate another game with terri-bad camera angling. Devil May Cry. _________________________________________________________________ Attacks: 7.5 / 10 Overall thoughts: "Unnecessary combos." __________________________________________________________________ The attack system in Darksiders is... odd. It likes to give the illusion that you are making combos, and by doing so you are to be rewarded by adding a little "X " at the bottom of the screen. However, more often then not, combos are a bit of a moot point. There is no reason to do them, as it is much easier and funner -not- taking six years to kill a simple enemy, upgraded weapon or not. This also comes into play as you do get various weapons in the game, that also use a similar combo system. The downside though, is you have Primary, Secondary, Secondary to the secondary. So three different weapons that can receive combos, and about four that cannot. Don't get me wrong, a Gun with combos, or a giant shuriken with combos? May be a little unfair to the game. However, this game? IS a little unfair, as for most of the combos that are needed to progress require in-game money to progress. Which yes, you will be obtaining a bunch of it. However, in the end? These combos are pointless, as I finished the final boss up quickly without any muss or fuss, without combos. (Yay, quick time events.) _________________________________________________________________ Merchant: 2/10 Overall thoughts: "Absolutely pointless." Whuddah buyin? No. No sir. I am not buying anything from you ever again. I spent so much time, getting excited for the little bonus items that I could turn around and sell, for in-game cash, or when I acquired souls from beating up monsters, or from treasure chests, but all of it was for naught, when I came to the realization, that in the end you really didn't - need- anything purchased in the store, and would be better off just purchasing health potions, and revivals. Which means that these combos I have achieved are for naught as well. I may as well have just leveled up and used a skill tree to acquire these abilities, rather then pay a useless shop keeper, for useless moves, at the least if my character is level up and learning from his levels, there is a sense of growth. Bah humbug to this merchant system. ___________________________________________________________________ Story: 6.5 / 10 Overall Thoughts: "Story, what story?" Ahaha, the story of Devilbayonofwarlegendofstarfoxadventure? It was a mess, but it was a delightful mess. Something about it wreaks of a fifteen year old writing a story about the Four Horseman, while he is in a social studies class. All the way down to War looking like a refrigerator, with vacuum cleaners and bowling balls for arms. The weird part though, is that it did appeal to the fifteen year old me. Which possibly is what they where going for. Who knows? It did succeed in getting me into it towards the end, though I wish that it had a real ending instead of the "We will hunt you" "I know", Batman spiel. __________________________________________________________________ Overall completion: Darksiders. It is a very odd game, that fits into a category that... isn't awful. But, it does just a piss poor job at it's job, that once you have no hope for it getting any better. It does indeed get better... then takes a nose-dive, off a clifff, that was being transported via stealth bomber. The whole A.D.F.T was a bit bland, and if I do say so the entire game was pretty bland, and generic. Asides from the random Scottish landscape we get of Ulthaine "The Maker". It was flavour... very racist, and endearing flavour. Overall, the game wasn't the worst thing i've ever played, and most certainly if you have five bucks available to buy it on Steam, and you haven't? Be my guest, as it is a decent bland game. You can also get this game for free on the Playstation Plus. (Which is ever better then paying money for it. kikiki.) But, if you have five bucks, and prefer a cheese burger to this ramen? I'd get a grease-covered burger instead...
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07-30-2013, 12:31 AM | #2 |
Man with a plan
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 4,297
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Have you played Darksiders 2 and are you going to review it?
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07-30-2013, 01:33 AM | #3 |
Armoured Hero
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Las Vegas
Posts: 544
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Quote:
But, for the lulz. For a little bit of an "inspirational" trailering: for Darksiders 2. Brought to you by THQ and Vigil Studios. Is as the title states, the sequel to Darksiders. Y'know the game that is essentially "Legend of God May Cry Anetta of Persia" Of. Of. Of. The point is that Vigil games honestly did not learn from the last title that they have previously produced, and for the most part, did not learn from last time... On that note? Let me tell you a little bit of back-story about this franchise. Darksiders is set in the world of the four Horseman. Which clearly means apocalypse right? Wrong. Only in today's day and age, would we have to make things "edgy". Thus, in this universe to make things edgier than where the sidewalk ends by Shel Silverstien, it is a "Premature Apocalypse" Y'know, the one that happened when your mom happened to give you your little brother, and suddenly the mail man is playing a bigger part in your life, then just delivering mail, now he is delivering packages... more. This game serves as a weird "Time period" piece, as it takes place before the events of Darksiders, but really only the end of the first game... As if they where happening at the same time... but.. not really. Anywhore. The point remains that the hypothetical "Plot" of the game boils down to is War's effeminate brother Death has found out about the transgressions of the beginning of the first title's plot, in which "War dun did a bad thing" in prematurely starting the apocalypse, but Death believes that War is in the clear. Because "HE WAS FRAMED." Y'know, the plot of the first game. So, being the awesome brother Death is, he has decided to be a broseph and put War in the clear, so this way they can possibly fix the events of the first game and resolve everything from the first game. Cool story bro. -_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_- The review: If you could not tell by my pea-soup of bitter sarcasm I have left behind in the details of the game. I disliked this game quite a bit. Which, oddly enough despite the trail of tar I have left behind for the description of the game I have no problem with the weak story. My real problem I have is in the gameplay itself. As it very much so handles a bit better than it's predecessor in the form of fluidity. But, it seems that everything I had a problem with in the first game, has decided to market it's way back into this game, in full frontal ass position. Dammit Vigil Games. Now, I do have a bit of a disclaimer. By the time I did start playing the game, it did immediately attempt to cock-slap me with various things. Such, as pretending that it was going to be a successful "OHWN-LINE GAEM" as such, the game is a Ahr-Pee-Gee, with it's own "unique" level system, which is used loosely. Thus, you are required to sign-in to the THQ community in order to do anything with the game. Fun fact? THQ is bankrupt. Hardcore. So, in order to obtain the "Super special awesome levels of awesome" you must have sign'd into this network prior to THQ kicking the bucket. Unfortunately for me? No such luck. This however, was not the worst thing in the world. I was still allowed to sign-in and as a added bonus. If you played and beat Darksiders on one HDD? Guess what? You get other "Super special stuff of stuff" in-game content. Woot. Oh what is this? I can't use the content until the end of the game? Bollucks. So, let us talk about the individual aspects of this game: Story: TL;DR: Dat Supernatural story. 6/10 Ahahahahahahahahaha. Ok, so this game took everything the first game did wrong? Followed by making it worse. It has gone from this very... Todd McFarlane type universe to... A piss poor stereo-type adventure, involving Death the Emo-loser, The entire Island of Scotland, Bureaucratic Bonemen, and the plot based around Supernatural. Cool deal. Now, don't get me wrong. In the first game, they had a character that also was Scottish, in fact in the first game I feel as if he made it stronger. But, I am also biased. Sew me. Where as in this game, you get to meet "Island of the Useless Scotsman" which is a society of Scottish Giants, who created the universe. Unfortunately as they are unstoppable at being useless, they are unable to clean up the antagonist "Corruption" which is this games way of saying "Bad stuff". There are some other aspects of the story that I really don't want to get in depth about, that make me rage and flail at, however I feel it is better left at you forming your own opinion in this sense, as it is a bit of "To each their own" status forming ability. Gameplay: TL;DR - Not enough focus, or dedication - 4 / 10 Fuck this aspect of the game. It is rare a video game frustrates me to the point of me cursing at my screen to the game being, and I quote "unfair". Which, is partially due to my own whining in which, the game does not feel fully complete. Which, to be fair THQ going under probably did put Vigil in a very odd spot. However, i'm not going to be fair. There is a couple specific parts in the game that require a bit of platforming, which is not this game's strong-suit. As this game attempts to be more fluid compared to the first one. Which, in actual combat? Fair enough. It is alot more fluid, and I love that I can flail on my opponents. But, this is a sub-division we will talk about in one moment. Platforming in this game? Fuck platforming in this game. You can and will die. Always. Always always. Aggggh. On that note. I am going to give a bit of a spoiler. There is a part of the game, in which via a mixture of quick-time events, and platforming you must escalate out of a flame spewing elevator, as the lift has malfunctioned. The problem is, some of the platforming is done in such a manner, that it is a quick-time event that is part platformer... in a odd turn of events. It likes to be very bi-polar, in which if you cannot read minds? You will die. Alot. I've heard of other people that have had this problem also. Fair enough. Moving on. Combat: TL;DR The Saving grace 7.5 / 10 As mentioned earlier in the overall gameplay section, that I had a bit of a hard-on for the combat of this game. Why? Well, it is about the only thing worth-while inside of Darksiders 2. I dig the RPG elements, and I like jumping around like a doofus whilst doing so. It is essentially a fluid battle style similar to other games... Oh... On that note? I have yet to make any puns about this game being similar to any other game, asides for the intro. God of War. This game is like shitty god of War. Infact, unlike being very "Zelda" to the first one. This one is more Prince of War Creed, if I had to compare it to anything. However, someone may ask. "Why Dzko sir, why is the score so low for something that is the saving grace of the game?" Well, anonymous questioner. In the land of boss battles, and health bars. There are things called "hit ratios". These hit ratios, and also damage ratios calculate how much damage is done in a given battle. This system? If you are in a boss battle? Forget about it. Team Vigil seemed to. This of course is ignoring critical damage, however even ignoring this... sometimes, you can do half a health bar of damage... why? Just cause. Ugh. Overall rating: 6 / 10 This game, is a slap in the face as it is just not completed, which is hilarious for a stupidly long game for a beat-em up... Took me about 25 hours rushing through everything, without sidequests (Asides from The Crucible, which we will not be talking about...) which is not bad for overall length. There are side-things to do, but I honestly could not be assed with it as they did not directly effect my experience gain, or item gain. So... bleh. I will be honest though, I may have enjoyed the game a little bit more, if all of the DLC is included... however, as it is not. It is a long game, as far as grinding goes. But, it is a bit empty in the long run. Should you buy this game? Nah. Unless you can spend less than twenty bucks? Avoid it at all costs. Spend your time on anything else. Like PlayStation +... a weird place where at the time of this review, you can actually get the first title of this series for free. Woot. Free. Otherwise, save the cash. Upcoming review: Portal Franchise. =D
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07-30-2013, 02:06 AM | #4 |
Man with a plan
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 4,297
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Not to sound like an asshole but I liked Darksiders 2. Granted, if I ever played one of the Devil May Cry games, I'd probably say otherwise but I like it. I played the Wii U version , THE ONE THAT RIPS YOU OFF THE LEAST.
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07-30-2013, 02:08 AM | #5 |
Armoured Hero
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Las Vegas
Posts: 544
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Haha. It's all cool. Darksiders 2. It had alot of potential... but, compared to... any other game ever. I think you would be better off playing God of War 1 or the new DMC to playing Darksiders 2.
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