[Scythe]

::My first time::

Chapter one: Call me Ishmael

It was a dark and stormy night, and I was asleep, for it was stormin' outside. Might as well, amirite?! So I woke up, turn on the Teevee, or 'Boobtube' as you youngsters call it these days (No one calls it that) and got my daily dose of MMPR re-runs while I ate cereal before school. Making sure to constantly yell at Tommy and make "Seig-Hiyagh" noises with my mouth, possibly spewing small chunks of Fruit Loops. So, at the time, I lived hilarously close to relatives. Hilariously because whenever an argument would ensue, we'd begin an argument in the same room and finished it in our own respective household. Paper thin walls are good for something. So these relatives are a rare breed of Nerdlinger commonly associated as Otaku, I think I share a hybrid class of that breed, but I'm not sure, I'd say that classification of me is barely at level twelve. It was from them that I discovered what Zyuranger was and eventually Dairanger. It was an awesome experience and really hard not calling Geki, Jason. Can you imagine if I'd done that in Japan?? They'd either egg me till I became a cake somehow or throw me a parade.

It was magical, though I still enjoy both shows for what they delivered. PR will be my go-to for cheesy, campy, fun with hammy acting. It had episodes that were sheer genius! Did you see that episode where they stayed at a hotel for who the hell knows what and had a pillow fight?! You totally thought Kimberly and Trini were gonna have a pillow fight, cuz hurr-hurr, they're girls, but no! Not this show! No, sir. Jason, Zack and Billy had a pillow fight, and it got better, they added their love of martial arts into it for some Pillow-Fu! Wasn't that awesome (not really)?? I'd watch the entire series over again if they did that in its entirety! Can you imagine the Dino Megazord pillow slappin' a giant monster with a pillow the size of a Beluga Whale?! Giant monster would be smothered into submission, lay down on the floor, and explode. Pillow posing. The Dragonzord could've even been a body pillow, but that's a tale for another day.

Lookin' back, I think I was that hipster-jackass kid in middle school who was all: "Uh-Hurr-Durr, Power Rangers, I liked them better as Zyurangers." Though not really, cuz I was still hella on-board with PR up until the Lost Galaxy season.

Best part though is explaining in high school to peeps that one episode of Zyuranger where Barza teamed up with the creepy guy with the weird nose to kill his grandson with a bunch of guns and hand grenades cuz he wasn't suppose to wake up Green Ranger Mummy, then explaining to the same exact people that you're not on drugs. Good times.