[acdcguy]

Quote:

Originally Posted by GreenPsychoRanger

You ever get that feeling that you've overstayed your welcome somewhere? That even though you think you have friends and that you think might be of some value, you hopelessly cling thinking you're right? But in the end only feel like your deluding yourself? And then you begin thinking, "Why do I stay? They don't need me around for anything." Which eventually turns into the thoughts of, "All you're doing is getting in the way because you don't contribute to anything. You should just do them a favor and leave. They won't mind." And then you think it's just the depression talking, which then makes you paranoid. But then it eventually settles because you shut down. And then you begin the cycle again, thinking it'll be different. But in the end, it's just the same old thing over, and over, and over again.

I get this feeling all the time. It doesn't help that I've never been in a relationship and get told that I'm not attractive enough to date. Even as a kid I had students gang up on me and bully me, and teachers that told my parents I bring it on myself because I exist, and some kids exist for that purpose. I had an art teacher that forced me to sit alone and told me my existence was a distraction to other students. She would throw away my art projects and tell me I didn't put my name on it and weren't any good anyways. Every time I got bullied she would give me detention. In fact she's the reason my parents pulled me out of that school. Before I left that school she told me I won't amount to anything in art. Well guess who's an art director now bitch? I try to not let it bother me but that still sits in the back of my head telling me this is why I am not as successful as I should be and is the reason I'll be forever alone.