[Future Rider Prism]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Spearichu

Let see I was either 20 or 22 when my grandma on a birthday call from her was telling me how she is worried that I haven't done anything in my life like getting a driver's license or school. Might of been 20 because I didn't have a job then. Because back when she was this age or when my dad at this age.

The other one was on my 21st birthday which was because two days before I failed an interview. Wouldn't be so bad but my mom is the type that if frustrated she will lash out on others. So even if I told her I tried and that she knows I am shy, not good with talking to people especially under pressure. Which I don't understand because my brother also did the interview right before me at the same place and got the job but noooooo she had to be frustrated. You know what is real fun? Sitting in the parking lot of a grocery store trying not to cry because you know you most likely will if you go into the store. We went out for breakfast at a buffet (Golden Corral) for my birthday. You know how fun it is not to look like you are depressed in public? I know at least some of you understand that very well.

Yeah not fun birthdays when you feel like a piece of shit questioning why you were even born. Questioning if you were better off dead. Feeling like you are just a big disappointment to the family. For me it was feeling like a disappointment to my dead dad.

I shouldn't have said anything about it. I can only begin to understand how that feels, and I'm sorry I made you think about it again.

I fell like I've really messed up. I'm gonna stop talking before I say something that makes things worse.