[Kamen Rider Die]

KAMEN RIDER REVICE MOVIE SPIN-OFF NET DRAMA: BIRTH OF CHIMERA



Good lord, was that ever dull and nonsensical. It’s a TTFC special that’s half ludicrous exposition, and half rote and predictable origin story. Far from getting me excited for Battle Familia, it’s maybe killed most of my interest? It’s all trepidation now, you guys.

It doesn’t help that Azuma/Daimon makes almost no sense in this. He’s a different Giff acolyte from the ancient past that we’ve somehow never heard of until now, until Hiromi AND HIROMI ALONE stumbles upon him after 80 years in the jungle, at which point he goes back to civilization for basically the exact opposite reasons he left in the first place. Nothing he’s doing makes any specific sense (and he gets three costume changes in this one goddamn special!), except for the parts that just come off like a less-interesting Akaishi. I do not like this movie villain, and the movie hasn’t even started yet.

Sadly, Nozomu isn’t much better! His main laudable attribute is having his dad played by Takaiwa, and I can’t think of anything else I liked. The plot for his story is a drawn-out Aspirational Heroism > Mad Science > Collateral Damage > Revenge thing, and it did not endear me to this bland protagonist. I hope he gets his revenge against Azuma in the title sequence of Battle Familia, so I can forget about this whole episode as soon and as completely as possible.

And the Chic/George scene… ha ha, nope! You can’t make me talk about it! I’m not getting paid enough!

I wish I hadn’t watched this!

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KAMEN RIDER REVICE THE MOVIE - BATTLE FAMILIA



But this? This was okay.

Don’t get me wrong, there’re a million things I could humorously complain about from this film: “Game On”; Area 666; Science Tassel; Chic; Giffamilia Reunion; whatever Nozomu’s story was supposed to be. It’s a dumb movie – relentlessly, thoroughly, astoundingly. Nearly every scene is dumber than the one before it, and the movie ends with Ikki and Azuma fist-bumping in front of an explosion. The scene-to-scene continuity is absolutely insane, and most background details invite no small amount of pity. (One of the best is the reveal of the CGI Fenix jet that is too large to enter or exit the hangar it resides in.) This is, on one scale, maybe the worst summer movie I’ve ever seen.

But it’s also maybe the best one, because it’s the one with the Igarashi family in it.

This whole movie succeeds – to the degree that anything in this pratfall of a film can be considered a success – whenever the power of the Igarashi family is on display. That’s it. That’s the one thing this movie has going for it, beyond Geats. (So glad to see Geats! Even if his appearance here doesn’t technically work in the rules laid out for the Desire Grand Prix!) The Igarashis are, collectively, the absolute perfect mix of wacky, warm, heroic, and dramatic. This movie is 100% about leaning into that brilliant dynamic.

I loved that part of it, and am happy to forget about anything that isn’t that. (So long forever, Nozomu and your vengeance!) Best part of the film is Fifty Gale, the upgrade that Yukimi maybe generates by drawing power from her desires and the DGP’s Desire Deity? (Not… super clear on this, despite cheering for it.) Like, the Revice Trinity Form is something their mom makes them do. PERFECT. I love it, and I’ll always love it. The chemistry of these five actors – alongside any number of girlfriends, Work Dads, puppets and voice actors – forgive any deficiencies in plot or premise. I just need Genta to get flirty with Yukimi, or Yukimi to tell Science Tassel that he just effed up, or the kids to support each other against a dual-language eternal executioner. The details of this movie are beyond clarification or defense; the characters are beyond reproach.

So, yeah, I think I really liked this one, by the end of it. This family works in any setting, under any restrictions. They definitely tested my patience in this one (do not like Grown-Up Lovekov!), but it all worked out okay in the end. It’s the best worst summer movie yet!