[Paladin]

This tale is set in Gold Rush days, when the place to be was the Yukon. Because wool and meat were so vital, sheep became very valuable. One of the wealthiest women in town was a tough old lady named Beatrice, who had moved there from Boston but had become so acclimated that everyone called her Yukoned Bea.

Bea owned 26 sheep, which she named for the letters of the alphabet. Ewe A, Ewe B, and so on. Bea ran the only hotel in town, but she was opposed to drinking, and wouldn't rent rooms to any man who had a hint of alcohol on his breath. This did nott sit well with the local saloon-keepers, Hiram Lovedaw and Hubert Loff, so they bet Bea that one of them could invent a drink that even her sharp nose couldn't detect. The winner would get her best sheep that year, which happened to be Ewe F. She agreed, and they went to work.

Lovedaw's drink was called "Blue Lightning", and Loff called his Mountain Dew (this was long before the carbonated beverage of the same name). The day of the competition arrived, and Lovedaw went first. He took a long swig of Blue Lightning. Bea smelled his breath, and announced that she couldn't detect a thing. The it was Loff's turn, and Lovedaw was hoping that his friend would fail.


Since, as we all know, If Yukoned Bea whiffed Dew on Hugh Loff, Lovedaw won Ewe F.