[Klonoahedgehog]

Perfect ending theme for Harmoranger, just because i can imagine some of these shots with the Equestria girls gang.

[guncannon109]

Number 10: Suited for Success

Alright, lets get back to the top 11 with number 9! number 9! number 9!

Number 9: A Friend in Deed


A Friend in Deed is the eighteenth episode of the second season and the forty-fourth episode overall. When a newcomer, Cranky Doodle Donkey, moves to Ponyville, Pinkie Pie attempts to befriend him, however it doesn't exactly go as well as you might hope. Upon having her friendship rejected, Pinkie tries countless times to win Cranky over but keeps causing him even more problems as a result (all of which I will dare not spoil for those who haven't seen it)

All things considered, A Friend in Deed is surprisingly mature episode considering the age demographic. I know this show reaches a wide range of audiences, but its still targeted towards little girls people. With that said, A Friend in Deed is on here not because its an entertaining episode, but because its just a good one and one that I don't really see people talk about that often. Which is a shame because it really deserves more attention. Truth be told, this is one of the only episodes that I actually gasped while watching.

Again, like Sisterhooves Social, the ending is a little cliche but in a good way. I've seen this episode about two times already, and I pretty sure I'll be seeing it again soon as it is truly one of this show's finest.

[Klonoahedgehog]

You know i figure since at my pace it would take me like 2 years to get to this i might as well post my quick idea for the rollcall bit in Xyger Vs Harmoranger.

Discord summons up dead generals that were defeated by the Harmorangers plus grunts from both Ranger team enemies, of course it's all just a game to him to see the rangers weaken themselves by fighting that many enemies. Then they yell they're morph call. "Harmony change! Xyger evolution! Xyger Eeveelution!" And they morph.

Then the rollcall.
Honest power of the Earth! Harmony Red!
Laughing power of the Earth! Harmony Pink.
Loyal power of the Sky! Harmony Blue!
Kind power of the Sky! Harmony Yellow.
Generous magic power! Harmony Noir!
(Twilight's rollcall line that i haven't thought up yet.)

Friendship is Magic! Equestrian Sentai Harmoranger!

Evildoers hear our cry!

The Blazing Fennekin! Xyger Red!
The knowledgable Froakie! Xyger Blue!
The Elegant Chespin! Xyger Green!
The Crimson Whyvern! Xyger Crimson!
The Navy Deer! Xyger Navy!
The Rookie Eeveelution! Xyger Fairy!

Pocket Sentai! Xyger!

The two red:We are! All together:Super Sentai!

[KRX]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Klonoahedgehog

You know i figure since at my pace it would take me like 2 years to get to this i might as well post my quick idea for the rollcall bit in Xyger Vs Harmoranger.

Discord summons up dead generals that were defeated by the Harmorangers plus grunts from both Ranger team enemies, of course it's all just a game to him to see the rangers weaken themselves by fighting that many enemies. Then they yell they're morph call. "Harmony change! Xyger evolution! Xyger Eeveelution!" And they morph.

Then the rollcall.
Honest power of the Earth! Harmony Red!
Laughing power of the Earth! Harmony Pink.
Loyal power of the Sky! Harmony Blue!
Kind power of the Sky! Harmony Yellow.
Generous magic power! Harmony Noir!
(Twilight's rollcall line that i haven't thought up yet.)

Friendship is Magic! Equestrian Sentai Harmoranger!

Evildoers hear our cry!

The Blazing Fennekin! Xyger Red!
The knowledgable Froakie! Xyger Blue!
The Elegant Chespin! Xyger Green!
The Crimson Whyvern! Xyger Crimson!
The Navy Deer! Xyger Navy!
The Rookie Eeveelution! Xyger Fairy!

Pocket Sentai! Xyger!

The two red:We are! All together:Super Sentai!

Perhaps, "Friendship is magic, motherclucker!"?

[Klonoahedgehog]

I want to see if people think this is at least decent, this is a part of Lesson 1.

Meanwhile just outside of town, the dog monster was eating some of hi's stolen apples. He was really enjoying them until somebody just yelled out to him. "Diamond Dog! What are you doing?" The dog looked back and stood up. "Sunset Shimmer! I just having a snack!" He took out one apple and held it out to her. "Want one?" She looked at it for a bit and smack it out of hi's hand. "Didn't i tell you to eliminate the Elements of Harmony!?" Yelled Shimmer with a blazing fire behind her. He stammered for a bit. "Well it hard to find them when avoiding those stinky humans!" "Then don't! Just straight up destroy them until you find those elements!" She then snapped her fingers and many smaller dark monsters appeared around her. "Just take these and get out of my sight." She then disappeared in a puff of flames. The Diamond Dog then looked around at the monsters and then looked at the city. "What we waiting for? Go!" And he walked into that direction with the monsters following behind him.

The wait for negative criticism gets me like this.

[Matrixbeast]

A mild tip when it comes to dialogue is that, when multiple characters are speaking, to move the paragraph down a line. It keeps the flow. Some writers will separate dialogue completely, but I don't think it's entirely necessary. However, if you have long stretches of dialogue with little actions, it might be better.
Anyway, I don't have any real criticisms, but there are some minor errors.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Klonoahedgehog

Meanwhile, just outside of town, the dog monster was eating some of his stolen apples. He was really enjoying them until somebody just yelled out to him. "Diamond Dog! What are you doing?" The dog looked back and stood up. "Sunset Shimmer! I just having a snack!" He took out one apple and held it out to her. "Want one?" She looked at it for a bit and smacked it out of his hand. "Didn't I tell you to eliminate the Elements of Harmony!?" Yelled Shimmer with a blazing fire behind her. He stammered for a bit. "Well, it's hard to find them when avoiding those stinky humans!"
"Then don't! Just straight up destroy them until you find those elements!" She then snapped her fingers and many smaller, dark monsters appeared around her. "Just take these and get out of my sight." She then disappeared in a puff of flames. The Diamond Dog then looked around at the monsters and then looked at the city. "What we waiting for? Go!" And he walked in that direction with the monsters following behind him.

-Slightly edited version of your excerpt.

It's decent.
Try to avoid starting a sentence with a conjunction like "And", though. While I'm not going to deride it, it has to carry a certain sense of flow, and the preceding sentence doesn't lead into it.

As for the excerpt at hand, there are points where I'd make revisions in terms of wording and sentence structure, but for what it is, it's not bad.

[Klonoahedgehog]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Matrixbeast

A mild tip when it comes to dialogue is that, when multiple characters are speaking, to move the paragraph down a line. It keeps the flow. Some writers will separate dialogue completely, but I don't think it's entirely necessary. However, if you have long stretches of dialogue with little actions, it might be better.
Anyway, I don't have any real criticisms, but there are some minor errors.


-Slightly edited version of your excerpt.

It's decent.
Try to avoid starting a sentence with a conjunction like "And", though. While I'm not going to deride it, it has to carry a certain sense of flow, and the preceding sentence doesn't lead into it.

As for the excerpt at hand, there are points where I'd make revisions in terms of wording and sentence structure, but for what it is, it's not bad.

Thanks for the tip. I'll try to edit it to fit these better.

[Matrixbeast]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Klonoahedgehog

Thanks for the tip. I'll try to edit it to fit these better.

No problem.
I'm here to proofread anything else you need if you want.

[guncannon109]

Number 9: A Friend in Deed

Number 8: Magic Duel


Magic Duel is the fifth episode of the third season and the fifty-seventh episode overall. In this episode, Trixie returns to Ponyville within seemingly stronger skills in magic and defeats Twilight in a magic duel, banishing her from Ponyville. In Twilight's absence, Trixie takes over the entire town after encasing it in a bubble force field. The mane six attempt to reach Twilight in exile while Twilight prepares with Zecora for a rematch.

I've praised this episode many times before so I'll make this one short. Obviously this is a Twilight episode (Favorite one by the way) and one of her best. But that's the thing though, I have trouble saying this is a “Twilight episode” because an episode for Twilight is an episode for all. All the characters are at their best here and each get to shine, even Pinkie Pie (her role is something you'll have to see for yourself though, because its too good to spoil here).

From the comedy, to the conflict, to the resolution everything about this episode is truly briliant. I've stated that this list is strictly opinion based, but I can honestly say, much like A Friend in Deed, that Magic Duel is one of the best that this series has to offer.

Magic Duel, truly magical.

[Klonoahedgehog]

I swear i must have a big imagination because when i posted that scene i wrote earlier here i imagined it completely taking place in one of those reused sentai sets. Like the one that's a hill overlooking a town.